Saturday, November 27, 2010

And So It Begins

There is a once yearly change that takes place in our house, where all our usual things are moved around and Santas and snowmen take over. When my favorite chair is moved out of the living room and an actual tree is brought in to take it's place.

You might think I would be upset by all this change, this disruption to my usual routine.

I am not.

You see, I know what this means. When the tree comes in, when I see the stockings hanging by the window, I know it is time to being the Christmas countdown.

I am a Christmas Hound. I love Christmas! I love my stocking filled with treats, I love tearing open the paper on my present, I love sticking my nose in everyone else's unwrappings!

I've noticed Mom did not hang up my stocking. She knows I can't handle seeing it up. I will spend hours staring at it if I see it. I know one morning I will wake up and there will be gifts under the tree and my stocking will be stuffed.

I can't wait!

Friday, November 26, 2010

Why I Am Not Thankful On Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is another holiday that is not made for me. It should be. I love turkey. I love stuffing and mashed potatoes, rolls and butter, and don't even get me started on pie!

But my Mom never hosts Thanksgiving. She's not a fan of cooking turkey (and frankly, I've tasted her turkey, no one is a fan of eating it...) That means my family puts us girls in our crates and takes off to parties unknown.

We spend all day in our crates, and I might be the only one who knows what Thanksgiving is since when I was a young pup, my family took me everywhere and I know attended several Thanksgivings, but that doesn't mean Sarah Beagle and Olive Badger are unaware of doings a-foot.

We saw Mom baking a pie. We hung out at her feet and scarfed up any bits of pie crust that fell to the ground. We hopped around her feet as she was making sweet potatoes in the hopes that she would drop a marshmallow. She did not. We watched our family get dressed up (even Dad!) and we knew it was party time.

Just not party time for us!

And that is why I'm not thankful on Thanksgiving. I will be a little thankful later if, after Mom makes turkey sandwiches for lunch, she gives each of us dogs a little piece. That would go a long way to making me smile!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

A Pushy Nosed Menace

Me and my girls, in the Good Old Days

Mom, I know when you heard that terrible thud and found me trapped behind the couch in the bay window, you thought I was just clumsy.

But now that Sarah has also fallen behind the couch, I think you are suspicious that it's not an accident.

It's not.

Olive Badger is pushing us off the back of the couch!!!

I'm not sure if she's doing it on purpose, since you've seen how crazy she gets when she's excited, but I know for sure, I was pushed. Pushed I tells ya!

Or at least, nosed very hard.

Olive is a menace! A pushy nosed menace! Tell everyone to beware!

If you sit on the back of our couch, trying to look out the window for people walking, leaves falling or squirrels daring, you might feel the cold wet nose of the Badger tipping you end over top down into the abyss that is behind the couch.

By the way Mom, it's a bit dusty back there. I saw Badger sized dust bunnies!

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Day Light Savings Time Has No Meaning To Dogs

I live my life by my internal clock. I know exactly when I should be fed every day. I know exactly when I should be let out of my crate every morning. And I know when I should go to crate at night. Sometimes, at night, I get tired of waiting for my parents to be ready for bed and go to crate without prompting.

The point is, I know what time it is. Sure, I'll try to fudge and get my meals early. I've been known to drag my food dish around the kitchen an hour before it's time. I'm just testing my old folks, to see if they really do pay attention to the clock.

But there are two days every year that mess me up. One is in March, and the other, unfortunately is today.

Mom says it's Daylight Savings Time and we either spring forward or fall back. I like the spring. I like eating earlier than my clock says I should. But today, today is the worst! Mom says it's 11, and I have to wait an hour until lunch.

I say it's lunch time right now and I'm going to snuffle around the laundry room looking for lost pieces of dog food.

Mom says I have to get out of there, she knows I'm one nosing away from knocking over the whole bag of dog food.

This day is truly a horrible, rotten, no good sort of day.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Halloween Is Bad For Dogs

This holiday, this "Halloween", is designed to make dogs unhappy.

First, there is the awful possibility that your parents will shove you into an uncomfortable, unbreathable costume. I'm ashamed to say I speak from experience. Dog Dracula, anyone? The stores are full of pet costumes. I had to wear a full cape. Try going the the bathroom in a cape! Not for the faint of heart.

Second, and this is only second because of how it came to mind. It is equal to the first in horror. There are bowls of treats everywhere. And not one drop should go to dogs.

Oh, the inhumanity! To hear my family's hands rustling around in that big bowl of yumminess, knowing full well that nine times out of ten, they will sit down with CHOCOLATE candy.

Chocolate! Something no amount of sad, begging, puppy eyes will get me.

Thank goodness Grandma Mary makes divine caramel corn every year.

If I'm very lucky, and sit pretty, I will get a piece of that.

If it weren't for the caramel corn, I'd say we should ban this holiday. But, I'll be honest. That corn is so good, one piece, ONE piece, is worth the rest of the Halloween horrors!